Young Geoffrey Looks for Love (redux)

I come to you, Gentle Readers, for help. My previous advertisment on Plentyoffish.com has failed to introduce me to the slutty yet loyal woman of my desire. I have, thus, re-written said profile, as follows.

I have no sense of honour, humanity or humour. I abuse cats, dogs and small children. If I write to you, your best bet will be to just ignore me; otherwise, I'll never cease to dog your door.

When not wasting time bothering strangers on dating sites, I read, write and steal Doctor Who and Battlestar Galactica videos from torrent sites.

Is it be any wonder I live in Parkdale or ride a bicycle rather than drive a car?

I like my women young, full-breasted, braless, short-skirted and stupid. If you think for yourself, believe that "no means no" or that Steven Harper is a fascist in short pants, just pass this add on by.

If you live for Kraft Dinner, dote on soap-operas and long to be treated as a sex-object, we should talk. Please be between the ages of 18-19, stand at least 5'10" and weigh no more than 105 pounds.

Now, I think that's gold - what woman could resist? But, I've been wrong before. What do you think?

[Poll #1108425]